HGG Community Forums

Today was a rough one. I tried so hard to handle it mentally, even though my brain kept doing awful ptsd flashbacks. And I kind of managed it- it was hard work but I was able to somewhat enjoy myself while out.
But then I got home an realized my wheelchair’s wheels are disintegrating. Which means I no longer have a safe, working chair and my mobility is gone. I got lucky finding this one secondhand, because insurance refuses to cover this kind of stuff. It’s pretty old but it’s been working. I can “zombie walk” as I call it with my cane for very short distances but that’s about it- my joints give out and I get very sick. I rely on my wheelchair for even slightly being able to be some semblance of normal.
I also lost $650 that go to my grocery bills this month. There is no way in heck I can afford new wheels, they run quite a bit of money. And my chair is older, so it’s only a matter of time before the rest of it gives out- so really it’s a bandaid fix anyway. I’m a single parent as well so all my money- which isn't much- goes to my medication and my five year old child. I don’t even know how I’d save up for something like this, even if I managed it, it would take so much time and it’s time I just do not have.
Basically, everything sucks right now. Being disabled is hard, especially when health care is so bad and doesn’t want to do anything to help. I’m so exhausted, I’m so tired of existing and being like this but it’s just out of my control, I can’t fix myself.

I’m glad a new breeding season is going to start soon so I’ve got some distraction going. Haj keeps me sane as is possible, and y’all are so fun to play with.
My goals for this season are getting on the leaderboards again- it seems I’ve been bitten by the leaderboard competing bug since I was so successful this breeding year. Growing my show string, finishing my Winter Magic gmt project, and 5% boosting my liver chestnut stallion Colorado Dreaming are my major big money/HBs goals for this new year. I also want to max out a couple of my foals- I’m being very ambitious this season.
Tell me about your goals, and show my your favorite upcoming stallions, I’d love to see them! Distract me with shiny ponies please haha