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Vent post about illness
  • VenemousGiantVenemousGiant
    Today is a hard one.
    I have several chronic illnesses that render me pretty much bedridden. Since late last night, all of them are flaring at once. This happens sometimes and it’s the worst- they feed off each other in an awful cycle. I’m exhausted. Existing while so sick is exhausting. There’s no getting better (degenerative- only worse) so it’s hard to find things to be positive about.
    I spend most of my day online here because of these things- Haj is a great distraction from my illnesses and disabilities. Blowing hbs on pixel ponies helps keep me focused elsewhere.
    But today? Nope. Today is terrible and I’m exhausted. Gonna spend today trying to save up for another barn and be dead to the world.
    Continuing my reign as the most annoying player on the forums and hgg’s favorite butch lesbian cowboy

    One Flesh, One End


    They/them
  • AmmitAmmit
    I sent you a little something.

    I know what it is like. I have hypoparathyroidism and after getting diagnosed about 10 months ago I have made improvements but it is still a daily roller coaster. I never know how functional I will be day to day. I have been fighting with vision problems for the last few weeks. I have been bedridden by this for many stretches. I have heart arrhythmias, strokes etc from it. I think what people who don't have chronic illness don't understand is that it chips away at yourself. It is not like having a cold where you know you will get better eventually. It is hard to look at your future and know this is just you now. It sucks and chronic illness can suck it. >:P
    Need to contact me? Read this first. Only send me a PM for PayPal issues or if I ask you to. Otherwise, make a forum post. You will get a better faster answer by making a post.

    I sometimes get busy and miss things. If your private message, question, etc. gets missed please ping me so I can follow up with you. I am also always happy to explain or clarify. (HAJ does not have a customer service email, please send me a forum message! )


    she/her
  • VenemousGiantVenemousGiant
    Oh my gosh, that was so kind of you! Thank you so much Ammit.
    Wow we are in a similar boat for sure. I’ve had two strokes, and I lost around 75% of vision a year ago. Getting constantly worse and being powerless to do anything to stop it is awful. I used to work on farms and ranches and ride all the time and now it’s been five years since I was able to step foot in a barn, so Haj is keeping me sane.
    I’m sorry you’re having such a rough time too! That sounds awful to ho through. Sending you all the love and big heck off energy to your chronic illness- I hope you get some softer days.
    Continuing my reign as the most annoying player on the forums and hgg’s favorite butch lesbian cowboy

    One Flesh, One End


    They/them
    Thanked by 1Ammit
  • CeffylDwr
    As a fellow spoonie I commiserate on how horrid chronic and complex illnesses and their freaking comorbids can be and how much of a distraction from it HAJ can be. I am so sorry all your stuff is flaring up together today and I hope your good (least as good as they can be) days can outnumber your bad days for as long as possible to help you make it through those terrible days.
    Dabbler in EVERYTHING.
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